Worlds of Power: Castlevania II — Simon's Quest (1990)

Authors: Christopher Howell and F.X. Nine | Page Count: 138

"I was not born a hero, Timothy Bradley, but I have faced my fears.

He who confronts his deepest dreads everyday… that person is a hero."

F.X. Nine is the pen-name of Seth Godin, an entrepreneur, as such. It seems he sketched the basic plots, players, and game-related specifics of this series. In this entry, Christopher Howell is the one who brought it all to life. As the dialogue is what overwhelmingly sells this for me, as opposed to the adapted aspects, my praises will naturally fall primarily upon Mr. Howell. It should also be noted that Nintendo did not ultimately endorse this endeavor.

To specifically address the nature of this as an adaptation of an NES game, I must immediately relate that it does not strictly follow the events of the game. I’ll pull a percentage out of my posterior and say it’s about 40% accurate, I guess? A sincere attempt is made to respect the geography and layout, but significant changes are definitely afoot.

The most far-reaching change is that Simon Belmont is not traveling alone in this iteration of the tale. He plucks a middle-schooler from earth to accompany him on his quest to rid himself of Dracula’s curse. Funny how that’s actually the name of the third game, even though it’s a significant part of the second. Simon and Timothy Bradley are a classic odd couple. Simon is stoic and severe; Tim deals in puns, bad jokes, and bad habits.

If you’ve ever wondered what it’d be like if there was an episode of Kyoryuger where Nobu and Tessai worked together, this is the book for you.

There are a few typos. I believe I counted four, but they honestly aren’t problematic. There are hint boxes, referring to the game, presented at the end of some of the chapters. They don’t always paint a full-enough picture (you have to break through the floor to find both the laurel and garlic salesmen in Aljiba), but everything actually stated in them is accurate. Oddly enough, one of them uses the alternate romanization for Rover Mansion (Lauber), when Rover is used in the main text.

Oh, and get this: Howell actually explains why the townsfolk are cryptic and deceptive!

In one instance, an item is established as being necessary, only to have another used when the requisite situation occurs. Also, two of Dracula’s parts were changed. None of the above are huge deals, for a few reasons: 1.) The bits referring to the game—the hint boxes—are correct, as stated. 2.) The item switcheroo can actually be interpreted as the set-up for something much later in the text. 3.) One of Dracula’s pieces in the game wasn’t even part of his body! 4.) The specifics of the lore and mechanics aren’t the actual focus, here. Emphasis is placed, instead, on the characters. Specifically Tim, of course. Through his eyes, we’re exposed to ridiculously clever metaphors, similes, and descriptions of the world of Castlevania. There’s also a great wealth of wonderful statements about life itself.

What’s on display here is so effective that I’m willing to overlook one of my biggest pet peeves in fiction: event skips. As a kid, I even wrote Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman asking about the excised quest for the Hammer of Kharas between the end of Dragons of Autumn Twilight and the beginning of ...Winter Night. Hmm, looks like they did end up writing a book about it. Too bad I don’t care, anymore~

Here, I think it was to preserve the surprise of some of the puzzles, but the journey through Berkeley Mansion definitely whet my appetite for five more helpings of urban exploration that were in no way delivered upon.

If you end up purchasing and enjoying this, please, please consider watching Engine Sentai Go-Onger and its dedicated movie. You will find much the same sentiments, therein. You will find that Sentai deftly balances humor and meaningfulness in exactly the same manner as this book. The excerpt read during Awesome Games Done Quick a few years ago is NOT representative of the entire experience. This is a book very much worth reading, especially for children. It’s the perfect mix of heartfelt inspiration, goofiness, and the quaintly macabre.

Son, You are 4 Too Young To Be Telling Old Man Jokes out of 5

Nutted by NEG.

Chapterhouse: Dune (1985)

Author: Frank Herbert  |  Page Count: 476

'Some never participate. Life happens to them. They get by on little more than dumb persistence and resist with anger or violence all things that might lift them out of resentment-filled illusions of security.'

-Alma Mavis Taraza

The last of the original Dune books wasn't planned to be the last. Frank had hoped to finish the second trilogy (Books V + VI + VII) but sadly he died before it could be written, less than one year after the publication of Chapterhouse. For the reader that means some things are left unresolved at the end of the book. The new directions hinted at don't come to pass as Frank would have directed them.*

Does that mean you shouldn't bother to read it? That's entirely up to you, but if you've read Book V: Heretics of Dune (1984), then I feel it would be folly to stop thereafter, because Book VI is an improvement upon its predecessor, bringing the quality back up to a level almost equal that of the first trilogy (I + II + III).

In Chapterhouse: Dune the Honoured Matres of the Scattering are hunting and killing the Bene Gesserit. The Sisterhood is large and spread across many planets but the Honoured Matres are erasing them from the universe on a mass scale.

To ensure the survival of both their Order and homeworld they have the option of setting something in motion that'll change everything, from the very small to the very large, like an interdependent ecology. The book explores the decision making process, among other more personal decisions, some of which are calculable to a certain degree but still dangerous.

The women have a small number of human subjects in their care, under deep scrutiny. Likewise, thanks to Frank's reveals, we're able to watch the watchers in the same manner. The Bene Gesserit view of themselves reveals much about the truth of themselves to an observer. The reader is also gifted a deeper insight into what the Spice Agony is and how it affects anyone brave enough to undergo the trial. (Like the aphorism says, change is the only constant.)

I was left wondering if, like in previous books, some of the passages/testimonials that introduce each chapter (in a sense presented as histories acting as a kind of prescient commentary when placed out of their original time) were from someone who would go on to play a key role in the next book; and if so, would their actions change how I view the things they said in this one.

4½ specialised complexities out of 5

*Brian Herbert (Frank's son) and Kevin J Anderson took up the mantle and attempted to write Dune VII, but rather than one book they did a Peter Jackson and split it into multiple parts (well, two). The books are called Hunters of Dune (2006) and Sandworms of Dune (2007). I've not read either of them because I read two-thirds of their Prelude to Dune Trilogy and found them to be a mere shadow of what Frank achieved, padded out with filler and lacking the multitudinous layers of what Dune should be. If I ever do give their Dune VII a try, I'll link to them.

Clive Barker's Nightbreed: Volume 1 (2015)

Authors: Clive Barker / Marc Andreyko  |  Illustrator: Piotr Kowalski  |  Page Count: 112

"Midian calls to all of her children. No matter where we are..."

Given the choice, I’d rather have had a sequel novel than a prequel comic book, but a comic version of Nightbreed that's canon is better than nothing at all, I guess.

It’s a story set in the present, broken periodically with flashbacks to years before. To confuse matters, the 'present' is the year the film is set, so, yes, you'll need to have viewed the film prior to reading, and the flashbacks are from a number of different perspectives, each one telling the story of how a particular member of the collective lived prior to finding the safety of Midian.

I had a secret hope that the series would do what the film failed to do: flesh out the inner-workings of Midian and deepen the concerns of the creatures, warts and all beyond just: we may be ugly on the outside but humans are morally uglier on the inside. With that in mind, it begins badly. Presenting Peloquin as a kind of monstrous version of Wolverine was worrying. Thankfully, his story is just one of many spread out over the years with each era given its own visual look.

The histories continue in a similarly bland fashion until the end of issue three. Without going into detail, an unexpected element is introduced that may (fingers firmly crossed) turn out to be a pivotal happening further down the line. There are a number of different routes it could take and I'm guessing that most—if not all—of them end in bloodshed. The only question is whose blood; Natural or Nightbreed?

The cover art by Riley Rossmo is excellent but misleading. Only about half of those shown actually feature in the first volume. I didn't feel cheated because squeezing any more in would've made the story seem even more piecemeal than it already is, but it's worth mentioning, nonetheless, in case one of those pictured is your favourite and you were really hoping to find them inside.

The book collects together Clive Barker's Nightbreed issues 1-4 (of 12).

2½ learned behaviours out of 5

Children of Dune (1976)

Author: Frank Herbert  |  Page Count: 426

'When you believe something is right or wrong, true or false, you believe the assumptions in the words which express the arguments. Such assumptions are often full of holes, but remain most precious to the convinced.'

-The Open-Ended Proof from The Panoplia Prophetica

More than twenty years have passed since Duke Leto Atreides of Caladan first set foot on the arid landscape of Arrakis. Much has changed in that short time. The descendants of Leto are now children of Dune.

In a manner similar to how the ducal signet ring has passed to more than one successor in that time, so too has an important part of the story's focus. While the planet is always the largest concern, it's arguably the characters that make any book worth reading, so we have the twins, now aged nine. They explore their origins while their aunt goes ever-deeper into the political and religious realm, for reasons that she keeps secret, scheming how best to make even the most desperate situation an advantageous link in the chain of practical eventualities.

Herbert's presentation of the twins is amazing. Their heritage gifts them with certain talents and knowledge that belies their age, accentuating the almost magical bond that exists between a brother and sister born from the same womb only seconds apart. Each is able to instinctually know what the other is thinking, or, at the very least, make an informed judgement call on how their sibling would respond to any given situation, to anticipate reactions and even to allow for the unknown. When confronted with a problem, familial or otherwise, they've more than one perspective to draw on. When they debate it's like one mind questioning itself, excising the incorrect assumptions to leave only the correct path. However, it's a situation filled with just as many dangers.

For a time the book is heavily-weighted towards the women. The Reverend Mother role of the old religion never really went away; like everything else it changed and adapted to fit the political climate.

Previously we had a voice from the 'outer world' bringing change. Now there's a voice from Dune itself, a figure from the planet's past known only as The Preacher, passing judgement on the present situation, on the religious beliefs of the Fremen, on the ecology and on the state of rule.

I've chosen to highlight only a small part to avoid spoilers, but there's a lot more to be discovered. For example, most of us will know how easily the mind slips into romanticising what's past after change has occurred; the effect that has on larger concerns can be immeasurable and remain unseen by the populace who are an integral part of it. Remember also that the 'Children' of the title is more than literal and can be applied in a broader sense to more than just the twins.

5 divergent motives out of 5

Cowboys for Christ (2006) / The Wicker Tree (2011)

Author: Robin Hardy | Page Count: 216

"I am what the Goddess wants me to be.  All things to all men."

The Wicker Tree was originally published in 2006 as Cowboys for Christ, but the title was later changed to match the name of the filmed version (2011).  Normally I'd cynically bemoan such a change but the film was directed by the author, so it's not piggybacking sales on the strength of someone else's adaptation.

It’s Hardy’s semi-sequel to The Wicker Man (1978) but it has none of the same characters.  It's a sequel only in that it once again explores the similarities and differences between two different faiths, namely Christianity and Paganism.

Batting for God are two young born-again Christians from America: a successful pop singer turned evangelical voice of an angel, Beth Boothby, and her rather dim cowboy fiancé, Steve Thompson.  The two hopeful missionaries leave Texas to spread the good word in Tressock, a town of happy heathens situated close to the Scottish/English border.  Many of the Goddess-worshipping Scots welcome the pair warmly, especially Sir Lachlan Morrison and his wife Delia.  Lachlan is a businessman who also functions as a kind of well-respected town spokesperson.

The differences between the two cultures plays a crucial role.  Robin Hardy returns to the subject often, sometimes playfully and sometimes sensitively.  His writing is still occasionally awkward—there are continuity errors and unnecessary scenes that serve no purpose—but the structure, as before spread over just a few days, feels more natural than it did in The Wicker Man novelisation.

However, Beth and Steve are so fucking naïve that I found it impossible to get attached to either of them.  They walk into dangerous situations clearly signposted from a mile away.  If they weren't so Scooby-Doo dumb, if they had some believability to their actions and reactions, perhaps the exchanges and story twists would've felt more consequential and less shoehorned in.

Nevertheless, it's a better novel (but not a better story) than it's predecessor.  I'm going to keep my fingers crossed that the novelisation of the next planned film, The Wrath of the Gods (2015), follows the trend and is better again.

3 stuffed birds out of 5

Coraline: 10th Anniversary Edition (2012)

Author: Neil Gaiman | Illustrator: Chris Riddell | Page Count: 192

“The names are the first things to go, after the breath has gone, and the beating of the heart.  We keep our memories longer than our names.”

Coraline is a children's book.  It follows the conventions of children's literature closely, not only in story but also in structure and wording.  It even has a “Once upon a time…” moment but in typical Gaiman style it doesn't come until near the end of page one.  It's good to bend rules but he doesn't do it often often.  If he did, it might be a little less formulaic, and a lot more exciting.

It’s not even a very original idea.  The basic plot about a little girl who finds a tunnel to another world throws up obvious comparisons to Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland (1865).  It’s neither as imaginative nor as good as Carroll’s work but it’s darker in tone, and with it being Gaiman the way the fantastical is hidden in the seemingly mundane is well constructed.

The world and the people in it are described from Coraline’s perspective.  It’s not a first person narrative but she’s there every step of the way.  Her limited experience with the trials of life outside her safe home environment inform her decisions and her observations, which are then passed onto the reader undiluted and free of complication.  Children who are avid readers shouldn't have much difficulty with the language, although the very young may not understand the unsettling nature of some of the themes presented.
It'll likely appeal more to the kids that collect spiders in a matchbox than the kind that make daisy chains.

The 10th Anniversary Edition adds a short introduction by the author, and some black and white illustrations by artist Chris Riddell that weren't in the original release.  There's one full page picture before each chapter begins.  The actual story content is identical to the previous edition.

2½ eerie familiarities out of 5

The City (1994)

Author: James Herbert | Illustrator: Ian Miller | Page Count: 64

"Hey, Tinman.  Don't look now, but you got company."

The fourth entry in Herbert’s Rats books, but unlike the previous three (The Rats (1974), Lair (1979), and Domain (1984)), it's a graphic novel.  What’s even more unusual is that it’s a story told largely through imagery.  By the time it came out Herbert had developed a unique relationship with words, his descriptive language was a big part of his appeal, so delivering a story with minimal dialogue was a little out of character.

I’m limited in what I can say without touching on how the trilogy ended, so I’ll be brief.  It follows a lone figure as he returns to The City (London) in search of something he left behind.  The City is under the grip of a New Order.  There’s danger at every turn and eyes watching his every move.

The story is weak when compared to his other books.  It’ll be of interest to fans of the original trilogy but would probably be best avoided by everyone else.

Conversely, Ian Miller’s art is fascinating and is without a doubt the real star.  His blood red skies and swirling colour schemes help flesh out the grotesque perversions of normalcy and societal standings that are faithful in essence to the metaphor set up by Herbert in the original trilogy.

1½ bridges burned out of 5

Captain America: The New Deal (2003)

Author: John Ney Rieber | Illustrator: John Cassaday | Page Count: 176

"Blood on your hands, they say.  As though it stops there.
At the wrist.  Like a glove."

TND was John Ney Rieber’s first Capt America story, and the one that launched yet another reboot of the series, post 9/11.  It wasn't a good start.  It’s political.

I live in the UK.  We’re not patriotic.  It's a generalisation but largely true.  We aren’t taught allegiance in schools, or weaned into it by fraternities and sororities, and expected to declare undying loyalty, etc.  Being an outsider means I don’t know if the view I have of American culture is even remotely close to the real America; it’s a view based on media offerings, and we all know their truth to bullshit ratio.  The book embodies what the media tells me so I can't know how much of it mirrors real sentiment, and how much is exaggerated.  Irrespective, it’s not a good story.  If you strip away the self-reaffirming monologue, the calls for unity and the blatant mollycoddling then there’s almost nothing left.

Most of the text is in short, broken clauses; the type that's best reserved for action scenes.  When that kind of writing takes up the bulk of a text it disrupts the narrative flow and stops being fun to read.  It’s like listening to that kid with lung problems from Malcolm in the Middle read someone's diary.

There’s an attempt to show the 'enemy' perspective, but it’s uneven.  Respect to Rieber for trying, but when Capt resorts to beating down his demonised opponent with words, claiming that at least America doesn't kill children, I was ready to fling the book out the window.  I’d like to say it was a clever device to show him naïvely blinded by patriotism but I really don’t think it was.  I sincerely hope I'm wrong.

John Cassaday’s art is fantastic.  His depiction of the Captain sifting through rubble, gray dust filling the frame, with a pained sense of failure on his hero’s shoulders is beautifully presented, and the action scenes are dynamic.  It’s a shame that such great work was accompanied by such a problematic text.

The book collects together Captain America Vol 4, Issues 1 - 6

2 torn flags out of 5

The Caves of Steel (1954)

Author: Isaac Asimov | Page Count: 224

"Even as a youngster, though, I could not bring myself to believe that if knowledge presented danger, the solution was ignorance."

The Caves of Steel was the first full novel in what would come to be known as Asimov's Robot Series. Some people include I, Robot (1950) in the series despite the contradictions between the two works. I adore I, Robot, but the bridge narrative structure keeps it from being perfect. The Caves of Steel has no such handicap, nor does it rely so heavily on direct speech for exposition, meaning it flows much more organically. The pace is also improved.

The caves of the title are huge interconnected steel domes that house an ever-expanding human population. In contrast, the outer planets are populated by Spacers, people descended from colonists that left Earth centuries before. Whilst the Spacers embraced robots, the Earth people didn't. Resentment of Spacers runs deep, even in those whose job dictates that they should remain impartial.

When a Spacer is killed, Detective Lije Baley is tasked with finding the killer. Baley is an Earth-man. When he’s partnered with a Spacer, the Robot Danell Olivaw, more than one of his prejudices get put to the ultimate test. I'm guessing that Asimov must've really liked R. Danell, evidenced by his using the character in subsequent novels much more frequently than any of his other returning characters.

The world in Caves of Steel is beautifully fleshed out, with consequences that are far reaching. There are of course sci-fi concepts, but if you strip them away you'll find another of those puzzles that Asimov was so very good at. He doesn't use wild technology as a crutch, meaning resolution isn't reliant on some impossible science. Beneath the sheen it's a fully developed and deeply compelling detective novel that just happens to be set in the future.

5 diplomatic incidents out of 5

Captain Britain (2002)

Author: Alan Moore | Illustrator: Alan Davis | Page Count: 208

“I hit one of you and ten of you get nose-bleeds!  What are you people?”

Alan Moore’s only work for Marvel was for the Marvel UK imprint.  For too short a time he took over author duties of the unimaginatively named Capt. Britain.

The bearded-one plays it safe for the first few issues, but Moore being Moore means he can’t contain himself for very long.  Early in his run he chucked the manual out the window, rewrote the character’s origin story in a convincing manner, making the manipulative Merlyn and his daughter Roma much more instrumental in decision making, and turned the Captain into a fully fledged Moore-esque character.  It was exactly what was needed to revive the series.  At times it feels like an episode of The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.  He even slips in a quick vision of a dystopian England, much like his V for Vendetta.

It’s very British; The Captain gets deeply frustrated when things don't turn out as expected, and characters display the quirks that define the quintessential Englishman.  However, rather than reinforce stereotypes, it succeeds in turning them into comical strengths.  More than once I found myself in hysterics at the behavioural traits of the group.  The villains are equally ridiculous, with names to match: The Omniversal Majestrix Saturnyne; the Special Executive; the Avant Guard; and Jim Jaspers—with a name like that it sounds like he should be teaching high school Chemistry, not destroying entire worlds.

As the scripts got more insane so too did Alan Davis’ panels grow more adventurous.  Some of the expressions he uses are fantastic.  It’s refreshing to see someone break from a regular routine and admirably rise to a challenge.

The book is noteworthy for also featuring the first purple-haired appearance of the Captain’s twin sister, Betsy Braddock, who works for the British version of S.H.I.E.L.D, called S.T.R.I.K.E.  You may know Betsy better as Psylocke of the X-Men.

The book collects together stories from Marvel Super-Heroes (UK) issues 387 - 388, Daredevils issues 1 - 11, and Mighty World of Marvel V2 7 - 13.

4 superhero pip pips out of 5

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon: A Portrait of the Ang Lee Film (2000)

Author: Ang Lee & James Schamus | Page Count: 144

"The film is not crafted in the realistic style, as my earlier films have been, but the emotions it conveys are real."

Illustrated with more than 80 full colour photographs, this lavish companion book includes the entire screenplay of the film, alongside short essays and commentaries about the production from director Ang Lee and his screenwriter James Schamus.  There's also some words from cast and crew.  Scholars David Bordwell and Richard Corliss give an introduction and some brief history lessons throughout.  The text gives insights into what went on behind the scenes; it exposes the tragedies that dogged the production and the triumphs that elevated it but there isn't enough content to warrant the hefty price tag attached.  Half of the introduction is reprint from elsewhere.  The other half drifts off to become an appreciation of Hong Kong cinema as a whole, and while that was certainly fascinating it begs the question why it was included at all.  Smells like filler.

It's hard to score this one.  Let's say you liked the film and you find screenplays interesting.  Lets also imagine behind the scenes photos excite, you find small snippets of info from cast and crew insightful and you can afford to pay $32.95 for something that when distilled down to only text would fill about six A4 pages (that’s not counting the actual screenplay), then I guess you could give it a try.

The two most interesting things I learned was that Chow Yun-Fat wasn't Lee's first choice to play Li Mu Bai and only one of the cast spoke any mainland Mandarin that the director demanded.  I just saved you money.

1 pretty but hollow volume out of 5

Chasing Lincoln's Killer (2009)

Author: James L. Swanson | Page Count: 208

Chasing Lincoln's Killer is a novel about not just President Lincoln's assassination, but also the entire conspiracy behind it and of course the ensuing manhunt. Following many participants, we see the story unfold from the planning to well past the manhunt and trials of the guilty parties. The text presents the story as a more contemporary suspense novel rather than a history lesson, but still uses many details from transcripts and diaries of the participants as well as numerous photos from the period depicting many things from newspaper articles to actual photos of the conspirators. We learn a bit about how they felt about the events they were a part of.

What we don't really see in the novel is more of the historical causes and such that precipitated and allowed this tale to happen. This dumbing down is necessary for the books intended audience of young teenagers, so I can't really fault it for that. Don't want to scare the kiddies with the boring nuts and bolts behind the words. The book is well-paced and easy to read not just because of Swanson's writing, but also the layout itself. The big font and spaces are also intended to make it easier for a younger audience without the reading skills to handle a regular novels' length and small text. The book would be half the length otherwise.

Interesting subject matter written in an easily digestible style over 14 chapters that could serve as a launching point for the curious to learn more on their own.

3 Booth could have just strolled into the White House out of 5

Crash (1973)

Author:  J.G. Ballard | Page Count: 185

“The intimate time and space of a single human being had been fossilized for ever in this web of chromium knives and frosted glass.”

Crash is a subversive novel about a film-maker named James Ballard (the same as the author) who meets a deviant named Robert Vaughan.  The longer Ballard spends in Vaughan’s company the more influenced by him he becomes.  He's soon happily entwined in a secret world of car crashes and illicit sex, and as a result his own sexual ideals begin to change dramatically.  Robert Vaughan is a character seen previously in The Atrocity Exhibition (1970).  He was a perverted weirdo there and he's much the same here.  He surrounds himself with like-minded individuals and the reasons for doing so become clear the more you read.

There's no doubting J. G. Ballard’s ability to write good prose, he has a unique and commanding style, but there's only so many times I can read about man-sauce running down the cracks of car seats before I begin to get very bored of it (the exact number is once).  In fact, novels that rely on graphic sex bore me completely.  It was the knowledge that Ballard (the author) uses language in a very overtly offensive way that kept me reading, not the story or the hateful characters who were each flawed but not in a beneficial, sympathetic way.

Ballard has pointed out in interviews that the glamorisation and sexual means used to sell fast cars to the public is way out of control.  I completely agree.  How many times have you seen an attractive model draped seductively across the bonnet of a car?  The darker side of car ownership is the death toll associated with misuse.  We accept automobiles as a part of daily life, even lust after them, but they're as much instruments of murder and manslaughter as they are of convenience.  The later part tends to be forgotten—or more precisely pushed out of mind.  We put our children in them.  We fuck in them.  We cry in them.  We die in them.  Crash attempts to remind on every page that sex and death are inextricably linked and that one can be a means to the other, and vice versa.  It’s a largely boring but superbly written endeavour.

2 logic and reason are not the same thing out of 5