The Book of Lies: Liber CCCXXXIII (1912)

Author: Frater Perdurabo (Aleister Crowley)  |  Page Count: 200

'The more necessary anything appears to my mind, the more certain it is that I only assert a limitation.'

To give it its full title, 'The Book of Lies: Which is also Falsely Called BREAKS. The Wanderings or Falsifications of the One Thought of Frater Perdurabo, which Thought is itself Untrue. Liber CCCXXXIII', is perhaps the most accessible of Crowley's published works. The deeper, hidden meanings relating to his magickal philosophies are there to be deciphered and will, no doubt, be recognisable to members of the A∴A∴ and O.T.O., but there's enough disclosure in the footnote commentaries (added later but included in most current editions) to explain certain things to the uninitiated, to enable even a complete newcomer to follow many of the Qabalistic threads and understand that structure is as important as content.

It's a fascinating read even if you've no intention of taking the study further. He was aware of his reputation—at times he even orchestrated and encouraged it—but what may surprise people is how sharp a sense of humour the 'Great Beast' had. The title is an indication, but there are numerous instances within the book.

Also of note is Crowley's ability to use words as succinctly and beautifully as the poets did. There's no doubt he was well-read in philosophy and theosophy, etc, but he also shows an impressive disposition for poetry. There's some awful rhyme included throughout, but its clearly intentional. I believe that had he wished it, had his life taken a different path, he could've excelled in a different kind of art.

If you do want to connect more dots it's necessary to have a copy of The Book of the Law (Liber AL vel Legis) (1904) nearby, but know that doing so may raise more questions for the inquisitive mind than it provides answers.

5 epigrammatic forms out of 5

The Sandman Presents: Bast: Eternity Game (2003)

Author: Caitlin R. Kiernan  |  Illustrator: Joe Bennett  |  Page Count: 66

‘Sleep, child.  Sleep and follow me.’

Gods aren't flesh and blood.  Gods don’t die.  They simply fade away when no one remembers their name or what they represented.  Bast, the Egyptian cat goddess, isn't willing to go quietly into the neglected nothingness, so she attempts a comeback.  What she craves (sincere belief and a sustained worship in the waking world) is still possible, but in her diminished state reaching out across the realms for a second chance will take every last reserve of power she has.

Who better to latch onto than another female who is herself on the fringes, who doesn't fit comfortably in her environment?  Lucy McCuller’s troubles make her susceptible to Bast’s influences, but Lucy’s problems are bigger than her.  What's more is that ambition, in any form, has a tendency to take on a life of its own.

Eternity Game is a three issue miniseries that as far as I know hasn't been collected in a TPB or included in any of the post-Sandman anthologies, mores the pity.  It’s a brief but extremely satisfying glimpse into the mind of a deity on the verge of extinction.  It hinges on a truth that only those who've lived it can see and appreciate fully: something that would ordinarily be easily forgotten can be elevated in status and etched permanently into memory in the wake of tragedy.  If your intent is to manipulate someone, you can use that same elevation to your advantage.  It’s a horrible thing to do but desperation is a great motivator.

3½ slipping sands out of 5

Batman: Arkham Unhinged: Vol. 2 (2014)

Author: Derek Fridolfs  |  Artists: Various  |  Page Count: 168 

“Penguin’s been hiring people to kill you.”

“That old crow’s wasting his money. I’m already dying… of boredom.”

The second volume of video game tie-in Batman manages to outdo the first, but unfortunately it's on the scale of tedium that it excels. Being tied to a game plot limits the freedom an author has, and at the end of the day any changes made must be reset so that everyone is returned to their game setting. In a situation like that the dialogue becomes even more important than normal, so extra effort should've been made to spice it up as much as possible, but—no disrespect to Fridolfs, perhaps he was busy with other, more important projects—the majority of it could've been written hastily over a light breakfast.

Robin pops in and out of the walled city as if it's a twenty-four hour supermarket, making a mockery of the idea that it's supposed to be near impossible to escape from. Whilst there he becomes an ineffectual bit player in what amounts to an extended fight scene that goes nowhere interesting.

The Arkham City Sirens story fills in some of what happened to the trio of women after the events in the first game, but mostly it feels like an excuse to have ladies with back-breaking breasts jumping around. The three women are at least largely faithful in personality to their game counterparts, which is to say they lack any kind of warmth or likeability; even the colourful Harley, who's admittedly a love-her-or-hate-her character ordinarily, never escapes two-dimensionality.

The only part of the text that I enjoyed was a flashback to a time years before the walled city was in existence, a time that deeply affected one of the villains and set him on the path he's currently on. It's not in-depth enough to be called an origin story, but it's an insightful glimpse into what spurred him to take the first steps into his current career. It was a clichéd moment but because it dared to be dramatic it still managed to feel superior to anything else. Repeated use of flashbacks would eventually draw too much attention to the technique, but the distance it provides from the walled city seemed to have given Fridolfs the space he needed to better express himself creatively.

The book collects together Batman: Arkham Unhinged issues 6–10.

2 punch bag thugs for hire out of 5

Boy (2007)

Author: Takeshi Kitano | Translator: David James Karashima | Page Count: 185

‘He probably couldn't run fast enough and had been caught.  I suddenly became really worried.  I was completely alone.’

Takeshi Kitano is best known as a filmmaker, but in Japan he’s also a famous comedian, writer, critic and painter among other things.  It seems as if he’ll turn his hand to whatever best enables him to communicate with an audience.
Boy was the first time any of his fiction was translated into English.  It was published in Japan many years ago as Shonen (1987), so it wasn't a new work.

Two of the three stories are told first person and revolve around something I know a lot about: having a brother.  My own brother was a huge inspiration and defining presence in my life as a child.  I’d not change a thing about our time together, even the bad times, because they helped me become who I am.  That same connection is part of the glue that binds the first two stories together.

All three utilise a specific aspect of adolescence as a foundation.  There’s a school sports day that’s memorable for more than just the runners.  There’s a shared, inherited interest that gives two brothers a deeper understanding of each one’s nature.  And finally, there’s a tale that explores the tentative first steps of a youth experiencing the duality of love for the first time.

The language used is simplistic and beautiful; there’s nothing wasted.  The urge to fill the narrative with more complex allusions must have been difficult to quell.
However, that same simplicity may disappoint readers hoping for something closer to his violent film work.  If I had to compare it to one of his films it’d be Kikujiro (1999) but even that is far off the mark.

What the two mediums do have in common is an understanding of the value of expression.  Kitano is a ‘show-don't-tell’ kind of filmmaker and he uses that same principle in his writing.  Little gestures filled with deeper meaning are littered throughout and may go unnoticed if you don’t pay careful attention.

2½ bars of magic chocolate out of 5

Note: You can find spoiler-free, mini-reviews of some of Takeshi Kitano’s films at our sister site, In a Nutshell.

Batman: Arkham Unhinged: Vol. 1 (2013)

Author: Derek Fridolfs | Artists: Various | Page Count: 160

"There's always a reason to send in the clowns."

A collection of stories of differing lengths that are connected to events in the Batman: Arkham City (2011) video game. I didn't much like the game, but it's Batman in comic form so I read it. It's okay. It's better than expected.

Both the game and comic exist in their own kind of Elseworlds universe, so any changes to character design or attributes from the norm should be overlooked.

In this version of Gotham the old part of the city, Old Gotham, has been sealed-off and now houses the inmates from Arkham Asylum and Blackgate. The area is a large prison but the freedom given to the inmates makes it also a playground for crime, similar to how Manhattan was in John Carpenter's Escape from N.Y (1981). The area is overseen by Hugo Strange, Operations Manager. Batman mistrusts Strange, so he enters Old Gotham to sniff out the professor's true agenda.

Batman is the moody, broody kind. He kicks some ass and then returns to a nearby rooftop to converse with Gordon and comment on the themes and concerns that weren't able to be fully explored during the action scenes.

The familiar locations are there and the characters are plentiful, but putting heroes in a building that features in a game doesn't enrich the story all that much. What's more interesting are the alliances and disagreements that the villains, who will eventually each control their own little area of the game-world, engage in.

For the most part the art is as good as the other half a dozen (or more) regular Batman monthlies, which was a welcome surprise.

The book collects together Batman: Arkham Unhinged issues 1–5.

2½ double-crosses out of 5

Batman: Annual 2014 / Superman: Annual 2014 (2013)

Author: Various | Illustrators: Various | Page Count: 74 (each)

"That’s what Superheroes do. They hit people."

Annuals used to be eagerly awaited jumbo-sized hardback editions with specially commissioned stories. There was little or no reprint. The dates for year of first publication as stated on the copyright page of both these individual titles suggest a lot of reprint, although I can't be entirely sure of that.

Yes, that qualifies as an old man, "back in my day…" grumble. But £7.99 for 74 pages? In Britain we call that a rip-off. The last regular DC comic I bought was three days ago. It had 100 pages and was half the RRP of just one of these.

Even more insulting is that both publications have adverts! They’re relevant to the character, but still, I'm heavily opposed to that kind of thing. It means we're essentially paying for advertisements. Not good.

Happily, the content is worth reading. The Superman annual is targeting a slightly younger audience than the current monthlies, so the stories have a younger focus; but it's not exclusive, there are still a number of things that'll also ring true for adults and perhaps, in some cases, even leave a deeper resonance.
The highlight is a story by Devin Grayson with art by Ariel Olivetti. It begins with two kids arguing over who is the better hero, Superman or Batman, and develops into something more than the sum of its parts.

The Batman book is darker in tone than the Superman one, like it ought to be. The stories chosen are more diverse. Each one shows a different facet of Batman's character, so new readers will, without their knowing it, be seeing the result of a lot of history filtered into short, self-contained one-shots. They explore in very different ways and in varying levels of detail what Batman is and what he isn't, what he stands for morally and what people think he stands for.
One in particular, written by Andrew Dabb and illustrated by Giorgio Pontrelli, uses a fictional world as a contrast to deepen the 'reality' of Batman’s world. The motivations of the second lot can't ever be fully understood by the first, but the story is crafted so that the reader, who belongs to neither world, will garner a deeper appreciation of the hero.

Value for Money: 1 wallet moth out of 5
Superman: 2½ schoolyard squabbles out of 5
Batman: 3½ defining moments of darkness out of 5

Batman: The Dark Knight: Vol 3: Mad (2014)

Author: Gregg Hurwitz | Illustrators: Ethan Van Sciver / Szymon Kudranski

Page Count: 176

"They're merciless. They'll kill each other just to get to me.

Or keep me from getting to them."

I'm really liking Hurwitz’s writing style. He's not another wannabe trying to mimic Frank Miller. His approach to Mad Hatter is similar to the one he took with Scarecrow in the previous book, which is also something that the New 52 seems to be doing a lot. He shows us the Hatter's past to help explain his actions in the present. If I hadn't read both arcs so closely together I might not have minded that so much, but I did and it's either less successful this time or I was just less involved. Possibly because I just didn't like the haberdashery ham very much. If he's your favourite villain, though, the odds are you'll feel differently.

He's defined primarily by his anger. There are reasons given but it doesn't translate well into character empathy (unless you too are a vicious murdering psychopath with small man syndrome). His own failings being partly responsible for his warped state of mind should open up a door to a great tragedy, but it lacks something vital. When his true motivation is eventually revealed, however, it helps explain why he's so single-minded and detached about everything else.

There's a body count that's quickly forgotten, replaced by something no less aggressive but much more personal; put the two on balance scales and they would tip one way for Bruce and the other way for Gordon.

Van Sciver's art is great, but one thing in particular stood out more than any other: Batman's cape. It was simply amazing. His crosshatching was perfection. Small details captivate when they're given such love and attention. I also loved how during flashbacks the adults purposefully didn't fit into the frame.

Kudranski had the misfortune of trying to follow Van Sciver for the last few chapters. His style is interesting but the changeover was jarring to the eye. It also feels rushed, as if he was on a tight schedule. It's certainly not his best work.

The DK series is beginning to incorporate into its structure more of what's happening in the other monthly Batman comics that DC spew out (they're almost as bad as Marvel these days). If you're reading them all it's probably a welcome addition, but spare a thought for someone who doesn't or can’t afford to.

The book collects together Batman: TDK issues 16-21 and TDK: Annual 1.

3½ special teas out of 5

Bradbury Speaks: Too Soon from the Cave, Too Far from the Stars (2006)

Author: Ray Bradbury | Page Count: 256

"Run, leaving your footprints to be blown away with the firewind as the last rocket targets the great Cosmic wall."

Let's talk in unfair generalities. Fiction authors are different from other folks. They make a living telling lies much like actors, but that's where the similarities end. An actor is a tool. An author is a craftsman. Actors want to take your love. Authors want to excite your imagination. Within a fiction writer's falsehoods is buried a universal or deeply personal truth, waiting to be exhumed by a reader.

Authors shut themselves indoors and confess their innermost thoughts to a non-judgemental keyboard. They use their work to help them understand the world, not to make the cover of Hello! or OK! magazine. So why should we care what an author has to say about anything other than his or her work? Strictly speaking, we shouldn't. And there it ends.

And yet, while I'd much rather have a Bradbury novel or short story collection to take me journeying, I'll read anything and everything he wrote because his world view was informed 100% by his role as storyteller. When he looked at a tree he didn't just see a tree - he saw a place where children climbed and friendships were born; a shelter from the biting rain where two lovers first kissed; a place that blossoms once a year, under which a lonely mother cried. He saw the stories that might have been and both consciously and unconsciously catalogued the details he needed for the ones that would write themselves through him.

The thirty-seven essays in the featured book are of interest to me only because they were written by Ray. Some are two pages in length and some are ten. Some are thought-provoking and informative and some aren't, but in each instance his poetic mind was the hearth in which the insights were forged.

3½ backwards walks out of 5

Batman: The Dark Knight: Vol 2: Cycle Of Violence (2013)

Author: Gregg Hurwitz | Illustrator: David Finch | Page Count: 160

“Little pretty bat who flew his way to me…

Look into the looking glass, and tell me what you see.”

In contrast to the disappointing Volume 1, this second collected edition delivers the goods in style. It's bloody and violent at times, but so completely reliant on the small details too that it feels as if it was sculpted as opposed to the pieced-togetherness of the previous book.

The story takes us back to THAT night in Bruce's past. It's a device we've seen a thousand times before, but it's the context acting as the catalyst that makes it seem different. It's even presented as a comparative and contrasting element to the Scarecrow's beginnings, which we're also treated to. Again, his story is nothing particularity new to comics readers but it's so tightly plotted and executed with nothing wasted that it's a joy to read.

Hurwitz and Finch's Scarecrow is genuinely terrifying and his actions calculated and chilling. It's as if he's been pulled directly out of a lonely child's darkest nightmare. I could almost smell the dusty, mouldy odour of his face mask.

The art is suitably dark and disturbing. Finch's liberal use of black hides nasty things of the reader's own making. Unseen horrors fill the cold spaces and add to the unease. Even Wayne Manor is draped in shadows, its size making Bruce seem small and insignificant, as helpless as a child. I got the feeling that if he only had some warmth in his life it would chase the shadows away. That's why I love Batman so much. He's the valiant knight, the defender of the weak, but he's also fragile and broken beneath the surface and he knows it.

Hopefully the quality of this arc is a sign of things to come from Hurwitz's run on the New 52 and not just a lucky strike. The next TPB is due to be released in a few weeks, so time will tell.

The book collects together Batman: The Dark Knight issues 0, 10-15.

4 defining fears out of 5

Batman / Judge Dredd: Die Laughing (1998)

Authors: John Wagner / Alan Grant | Artists: Glenn Fabry / Jim Murray / Jason Brashill | Page Count: 95

"Let the dead fluidsss flow!"

The fourth and (to date) final entry in the Batman/Dredd crossover reminds the reader why the pairing was a good idea in the first place. It’s almost twice as long as previous books. It uses that extra space to craft a great Dredd story worthy of his own monthly Megazine. It's atypical of a Batman story but there's reasons that I can't go into why that's less of a problem this time. Events spiral far out of control and it all gets a bit insane, but when you consider who the villains of the piece are then that’s all the more fitting.

The fully painted art is absolutely stunning and the attention to detail is lovingly attended to (Alfred’s coffee cup made me chuckle). I’d be happy to wait twice as long for an issue of something if it was able to meet the standards of what’s on offer here. It took considerably longer than that because it reportedly went into production around the time Judgement on Gotham (1991) was released, which perhaps explains why the two books in-between feel a little like filler.
I still prefer Bisley's work on the first book but it would be hard to top that.

Often with crossover events, when the two parties go their separate ways at the end everything returns to normal, but there’s a lingering feeling that for Dredd’s world the memory of what happened won't quickly fade.

Note: There was an Anderson story (Postcards from the Edge) with a brief allusion to Die Laughing. You can find it in Judge Anderson: PSI Files Volume 2 (2012) or, if you prefer, a screenshot of the panels can be seen HERE. It’s not essential. I include it just for fans who want a reminder. It's not a spoiler to the Anderson story, but I'm not at fault if you haven't read it and still choose to click.

4 black hearts out of 5

Batman / Judge Dredd: The Ultimate Riddle (1995)

Authors: John Wagner / Alan Grant | Artists: Carl Critchlow / Dermot Power | Page Count: 48

“I seek no ‘sweet release’ from this life yet…”

The third Batman/Dredd crossover is slightly better than the previous one, but that’s thanks mostly to Critchlow and Power’s wonderful art, because the actual story is one that comics fans will have read a hundred times before.

There seems to have been an effort made to balance the work more evenly between the two protagonists this time that partially works given the setting, but ironically the setting is one of the weak aspects of the work; it lacks the dangerous unpredictability of Mega-City One or the dark majesty of Gotham.

Dredd’s refusal to give up his primary concerns even when confronted with a more immediate and dangerous one is another of the reasons why it works better than before. Most people in his situation would experience an internal conflict as a result of the external one, but his insistence that the law be adhered to at all times provides a stability upon which is layered some typically cold-hearted 'Dredd style' black comedy.

Batman gets to put into practice the ‘Detective’ part of his nickname, instead of just being an iconic ‘Dark Knight’ silhouette.

Both men are forced to rely on their unique strengths to see them through the hardship, but in very different ways. It helps build the mutual respect/hate relationship that each feels for the other, but it still doesn't come close to matching the tension of the first book.

The changeover in art duties partway through the story isn't as jarring as it could've been. Both artists have a similar kind of style and use a similar colour palette, so the casual reader may not even notice the difference.

3 grudges out of 5

Batman / Judge Dredd: Vendetta In Gotham (1993)

Authors: John Wagner / Alan Grant | Artist: Cam Kennedy  | Page Count: 46

“I don’t like unfinished business. And I don’t like vigilantes!”

The second Batman/Judge Dredd crossover isn't as good as Judgement on Gotham (1991). I couldn't shake the feeling that it was commissioned just to keep the pairing alive in the mind of the comic buying public, and to obviously make some easy money for someone.

Writers Wagner and Grant attempt to redress the balance a little by making it feel more like a Batman story, and they succeed. The Judge now feels like an unwelcome guest in Gotham, which, I guess, he actually is.

The villain is also Batman specific this time, but he’s one of the less interesting ones, in my opinion. And the story unfolding concurrently in two different places means the drama is lacking until the big reveal, but even then it's not up to the usual standard of the Batman one-shots.

Art is by veteran Dredd/Rogue Trooper regular Cam Kennedy. The colouring by Digital Chameleon is washed out and lazy; it's not at all complementary to his style. The story doesn't bother with a build-up, and realistically it doesn't have to because the first book did that, so the two men skip faux pleasantries and get right down to the gritty stuff. That enables Cam to have fun with an extended fight scene in which he keeps his angles low much of the time, imbuing the characters with the sense of grandeur that they deserve.

2½ time wasters out of 5

Batman / Judge Dredd: Judgement on Gotham (1991)

Authors: John Wagner / Alan Grant | Artist: Simon Bisley | Page Count: 61

“I can't stop! I'm goin' into an uncontrollable butt frenzy!"

As a young Faustus, picking this off a shelf in '91 was the most excited I've ever been for a ridiculous comic crossover event. Joe Dredd and Batman! Comic boner. The personality clash could be like two worlds colliding. While it's not quite that good, it's still pretty awesome and revisiting it again despite being 20+ years older gave me a similar kind of joy.

Batman has faced some very twisted minds in his own world, but he's never encountered anything like Judge Death before, so when the Superfiend D-Jumps from Mega-City One to Gotham it's going to take more than just a guy in a winged mammal suit to save the city from being Judddggged.

You'll need to be a fan of both characters to get the most from it. Wagner and Grant had more experience writing for Joe, and it shows. They don't do Batman an injustice, they capture his personality well and don't compromise his integrity in any way, but when weighed out it's mostly Dredd's story.

Each of the worlds has their own social problems. Dredd policies his with a stern take-no-bullshit attitude, and Batman does his best to keep the darkness from overtaking his in the usual pained, vigilante way. There's no buddy cop team up here. The two men don't even like each other, but that's usually what happens when two over-inflated egos are forced to occupy the same space.

There's a lot of humour throughout. Simon Bisley's fully-painted, blood-splattered style is able to be both aggressive and hilarious. He was the perfect choice to illustrate and highlight the severity of the story.

The easiest way to get a hold of this one is in the recent Batman / Judge Dredd Collection (2013), but it's been reduced in size, making it closer to a typical American comic.  To soften the blow, the collection also includes all 3 sequels, Vendetta In Gotham (1993), The Ultimate Riddle (1995), Die Laughing (1998) and the hard to find Lobo / Judge Dredd: Psycho Bikers Vs. Mutants From Hell! (1995).

4 swansongs out of 5

*Click the pic above for a wallpaper of the wraparound Biz cover.*

Blade Runner Sketchbook (1982)

Editor: David Scroggy | Illustrators: Syd Mead / Charles Knode / Michael Kaplan / Mentor Huebner / Ridley Scott | Page Count: 99

‘Many of the objects in this book, while fascinating, were either modified or eliminated for the final version of the film.’

I acknowledge that B+W ink and watercolour concept sketches aren’t the most exciting thing for most people but I usually find them interesting.  I say usually because this one manages to present the work in the dullest way possible.
‘Visual futurist’ (a fancy-schmancy name for industrial designer) Syd Mead’s work is rich in detail and his creations are so well researched that it’s easy to believe they could be functional if made in the real world.  The problem lies not with his work, but with the book itself because it offers very little insight into the creative process.  Mead’s lines are clear to see but there’s no information on his working method or the problems he’d have faced with the futuristic tech.

There are also a number of pages with costume designs from Charles Knode and Michael Kaplan that I didn't spend much time on, but someone with an interest in fashion design may may feel differently about them.

Like it says in the quote above, there are things which didn't make it into the film at all; they’re the most interesting aspect for that reason alone.
If you absolutely must own everything Blade Runner then check it out, but keep your expectations to the absolute minimum to lessen the disappointment.

1½ Ridleygrams out of 5

Batman: The Dark Knight: Vol 1: Knight Terrors (2012)

Authors: David Finch / Paul Jenkins / Joe Harris | Illustrators: David Finch / Ed Benes / Richard Friend | Page Count: 208

“The only one in any shape to talk is Two-Face but he hasn't said anything coherent since he conveniently started bleeding out of his eyeballs.”

It's been two years since we started this blog, meaning it's long overdue time we had some Batman on it. The New 52 seems like a good place to start because I hadn't read it before and just finally got around to it.

DC cancelled its entire line of monthly superhero comics and then started them over from issue one. It gave creators an opportunity to trim the roster, to have Batman do his thing alone, reliant solely on his skills and his experience in the field. It gave writers an opportunity to re-evaluate their approach and offer a perfect jumping-on point for new readers. Instead, they did exactly what they did before: they introduced the extended Bat-Family earlier than was necessary and further messed things up with an excess of villains. Why relaunch at all?

The inmates have broken out of Arkham Asylum. Again. Someone better resign over this shit because it's all too frequent. There's something unusual about each of them this time, so Batman digs for clues and chases a white rabbit down a hole of self-analysis that threatened to become something interesting in the second half but ended up being over all too quickly.

The dialogue offers an occasional flurry of style over substance but mostly it's standard comic book stuff. I'm not so naïve that I believe every issue can be a classic, but you'd expect a relaunch to pull out something special, not rely on a tired old plot with unrealistic dialogue. Alfred tries to help out by being sarcastic but he lacks any of the charm he ought to have.

Artwork is suitably dark and moody and much too good for the bland story that is supposed to underpin it. The two-page spreads are great.

The book collects together Batman: The Dark Knight issues 1-9.

2½ slow starts out of 5

The Ballad of Halo Jones (2013)

Author: Alan Moore | Illustrator: Ian Gibson | Page Count: 208

“I go out and buy a gun, second-hand.  I tell myself it’s for self-defence, but that’s not true.  It’s because I’m bored. […]  I take the gun and go sit by the window.”

Halo Jones is an average eighteen-year-old.  She likes clothes, shopping and parties.  Halo likes to live.  The problem is that living in the year 4949 isn’t easy, especially in the Hoop, a cramped and dangerous ghetto created to house the unemployed.  Its people have never even seen a tree.  Halo wants to escape, to see the outside.  Quite often when someone experiences those kinds of feelings it’s themselves they’re trying to escape from, but that’s just not possible, is it?

The Ballad is split over three Books separated by time and degrees of depth and poignancy. Without having an insight into Moore’s mind I can only guess at the pitch he gave to the comic’s publishers, and his reasoning for structuring the three parts like he did.  Whatever it was, I'm sure glad they fell for it.

Book I is a safe entry point.  Whilst reading you’ll maybe wonder why Halo is so well loved.  The drama revolves around a shopping trip.  Huh?  It feels like a soap opera taking place inside the mind of a fickle and diaphanous head, but that easy-life conceit was necessary to establish a parallel with the organic structure that follows.  After repeated readings you’ll get the answer to your question.

Book II ups the game, the danger level and the emotional content.  Bridging narratives are traditionally difficult, but Moore overcomes the difficulties.

By the time you get to Book III you’ll be fully invested in Halo’s story, feeling the pinch and pains of her situation.  It delivers the kind of experience Moore's famous for.  The journey to and through that third and final part is the reason HJ has endured for so long, and will continue to do so for years to come.

Ian Gibson's art is a perfect fit to Halo’s personality and world.  The flamboyant costume designs are like fashion sketches, constructed from graceful curves and angles.  As the story deepens his clean lines follow suit, becoming gritty and less airy, but even when forceful they're never ugly.

The new edition has a page size taller than the original 2000AD format, but there’s no distortion of the image.  That means there’s a large empty space top and bottom.  It also retains the beautiful black and white art.  The reprint by Quality Comics that coloured and skewed the perspective to fit the more traditional American-size comic book format is now just a bad, bad memory.

4 Hoop-life Heroines out of 5

Button Man: The Killing Game (2003)

Author: John Wagner | Illustrator: Arthur Ranson | Page Count: 88

“Twenty thousand pounds – is that a fair price for a man’s life?”

This first Button Man story appeared in the pages of 2000 AD in 1992.  If I go into even the briefest synopsis it could rob the story of its power, so I’ll be writing a review that tells you almost nothing about the thing I’m reviewing.  It’s the equivalent of a politician’s answer to a direct question.

From beginning to end it’s an intelligently written, beautifully illustrated bleak British Noir.  Making a reader sympathise with a killer is no easy task; John Wagner drips just enough info to allow us to decide if we want to do just that.

It revolves around Harry Exton, a former mercenary.  We don’t learn much about Harry’s past but his actions hint at one that’s filled with violence.  Whatever it was, it’s given him an edge: he’s good with a gun and can kill without remorse.  That trait makes him a desirable commodity for certain people.  It seems the pastoral English countryside has a darker side.

I adore Arthur Ranson’s art style.  It’s unlike traditional comic work.  It’s as if he’s taken an actual photograph and recreated it using only the parts that are necessary.  He distils the image into something dramatically striking through his use of a limited and muted colour palette.  Think of a 1970’s British Cop Show, and imagine it put through a Photoshop filter.
Most of the story takes place at night meaning Ranson’s palette is dark, and his locations shadowy, like a Noir should be.

There’s been talk of a film adaptation for years.  It’s perfect for a film.  It even has its own transitions that would work onscreen.  It would take a real idiot to screw it up.  The problem with making a film now is a number of similar stories have been brought to screen since its publication, so it’ll no longer seem fresh.
I'm also worried that if it happens in the current climate they’ll likely want to turn it into Bourne or Bond to capitalise on the action junkie audience, and that’ll diminish it.  Maybe it's best if it never gets made.

4 telephone voices out of 5

The Boozy Bard: Shakespeare on Drinking (2006)

Author: William Shakespeare | Page Count: 208

"I am weary; yea, my memory is tired.

Have we no wine here?"

Coriolanus.  Act I. Scene 9.

Boozy Bard is one of those books that leave you in no doubt as to the content, as the title tells you all you need to know. It's Shakespeare on drinking. Someone, the editor(s) name is mysteriously absent, has collected together all the instances that the bard had his characters tanked or used alcohol as a metaphor for something else. It's no surprise that Falstaff features more than once.

There's no good reason for it to exist as a physical book. A webpage could offer the same content and be equally as irreverent. Save yourself money by going to the library, borrow The Norton Shakespeare and then hit the bar to toast his good name until you see the underside of the table. Job done.

Naught but a waste of paper and ink out of 5

A Brief History of Underpants (2008)

Author: Timothy James Brown | Page Count: 128

"Some extremists refused to let their patriarchal oppressors remove their trunks before stuffing them with fire-lighters."

The book takes the view that underpants are hilarious. It proposes that underpants played a key role in shaping great historic events. It tries to convince the reader that it's the most piss-inducing, rib-tickling piece of prose ever written. Farting in a lift is sometimes funny. Urinating in the frozen food aisle of Tesco may even raise a titter. But underpants don’t. It's 128 glossy pages that smelt funny, half of which contain, I quote, "…some spectacular pictures of pants," is the author’s idea of a quality read. Thank Christ I only paid 49p for it.

American readers should note that "pants" in Britain is short for "underpants." The phrase "ants in your pants" is much more terrifying to us than to you. And when you ask, "does my fanny look big in these pants?" we have been known to occasionally drop our chips.

0½ for Raquel Welsh in her furry bikini out of 5

The Boy Who Kicked Pigs (1999)

Author: Tom Baker | Illustrator: David Roberts | Page Count: 124 

“Robert withdrew himself in preparation for the kick of a lifetime.  And then he burst into life and delivered a marvellous kick to Trevor’s arse.”

A subversive fantasy novella told in the style of a kid’s story.  The language used is purposefully simplistic and childlike, and for the most part wasted on the lack of anything interesting to convey.

The story moves from one event to the next with little regard for cohesion.  The first half feels like it was written simply to make up the page count, so that it could be considered a novella and not a short.  The second half has a focus that improves the narrative greatly, the light of which throws the first half into an even darker pit of pointlessness.  It's a shame as it’s a beautifully presented book.  It’s the size of a paperback but bound in an attractive, slick hard binding.  The paper is thicker than usual and serves the illustrations well.

Every second page has a black ink sketch to illustrate some part of the story detailed on the adjacent page.  The pictures are on the left side and the text on the right, and quite often were depicting something half a page ahead of where I’d read, so there were dozens of mild spoilers.  The illustrations will please fans of Tim Burton’s sketchy nightmare style; they're very obviously inspired by him and are the reason it's still in residence on my shelf.  Overall, it's a quality presentation for a work that I don't feel tries hard enough to really deserve it.

2 yes, it is that Tom Baker out of 5